I was reading some ridiculous Christmas-themed post on the Internet today (not all ones are ridiculous though, please don’t close this tab!) that had a list of “Christmas songs it’s OK to listen to”. Before I scrolled down to see the list I started mentally flicking through songs that wouldn’t be on there. Y’know; yer Slades; yer Wizzards; even yer Pogues, if we’re talking the strictly overplayed stuff.
All three were on the list! Now The Pogues and Kirsty MacColl, Fairytale of New York, I can see how that’s still a great song. It’s an anti-ballad that ironically disguises Christmas cheer within a gritty tale of a couple who can’t keep their shit together; but Slade? Really? Much as I love Christmas (and I fucking LOVE Christmas), and as much as I actually used to love that song, whenever I see or hear Noddy Holder beyond Halloween now I can’t help but flip a table out of annoyance. (Which is why my office gets into a bit of a wreck sometimes.)
(Fucking Wham! was on there as well. Fucking Wham! who don’t deserve that exclamation mark at the end of their name unless it’s actually spoken with clenched fists.)
I can only guess that the site I was looking at was trying to give off the vague sense of hipster irony by including these songs, but I thought the whole point of hipster irony was to go all the way into the forests of obscurity, hoping their mates would get lost behind the first thicket so’s they could feel all superior. Or, to lend it a more suitably seasonal metaphor, the guys who rubbish your presents because they were bought from Toys R Us and HMV rather than the local independent, probably fucking vegan health food shop where they procured their gifts?
Bollocks to it. Bollocks I say. And so here is my final revenge; 5 Christmas Songs That Haven’t Quite Got Overplayed Just Yet.
Reuben – Christmas is Awesome
The Killers – A Great Big Sled
The Pretenders – 2000 Miles
Mike Oldfield – In Dulci Jubilo
The Waitresses – Christmas Wrapping
So yeah. I’m honestly not blagging today’s post. Honest. Merry Christmas.